The Christian Cross of Misery

Waves of lightning try to conform

Ships roughly sailing through the storm

The battered ships with broken sails

The scars of damage tell the tales.

Power struggles within the seas

The gaseous fumes within the breeze

The fire raining from the sky

Broadcasts in German “Jews must die”.

To escaping my fate—I remain

Beneath the waves of hate and pain

Hidden in a world that is calm

Protected from that dreadful bomb

Slowly swimming under the sea

Searching for a place that is free

But as I scan the world above

There is no land, no life, no love

A promised land of hopes and dreams

Just a mirage, is what it seems.

Christians chanting biblical words

As Gods commandments go unheard

Different translations fuel the hate

Puss oozes out the festering gate

Who killed Jesus; why did he die?

Yet you still chant “all Jews should fry”

Each is to die for his own sin

It does not fall upon your kin

Listen to what you’ve been taught

There is no man that sinnith not

A normal, mortal man of peace

A time where all the deaths will cease

There will not be a virgin birth

Both his parents come from the earth

No second coming will you see

The promise land is where we’ll be

The feeling of eternal joy

For every Jewish girl and boy

It does not matter what you believe

Noahide laws are all you need

To enter through the pearly gate

There is still time; it’s not to late

The other laws are not for you

Following them all—are our dues

To remain as the only few

Gods chosen people are the Jews.

We were chosen by god—to teach.

There is only one God—the speech

The Jews are no better than you

We all suffer when you pursue

Our beliefs are what you resent

Believing we misrepresent

Propaganda throughout the land

All the money’s not in our hands

We do not hold all the power

Look at how you’ve made us cower

There is no land, no life, no love

Only hope of heaven above

Beneath the waves of hate and pain

Hidden from a world that’s insane

Waiting for a chance to break free

The Christian Cross of misery

US Express—Trucking Company or the Grim Reaper?

US Express—Trucking Company or the Grim Reaper?

          After my mother and I delivered our load we pulled the tractor trailer into an open field in a place I later called Mud-Duck Ohio and waited for US Xpress to dispatch their orders. Mud duck is trucker’s slang for a weak signal on a CB radio as the signal being stuck in the mud. We watched the other semi drivers pull their trucks into the field beside us, but we didn’t get out of our trucks to swap stories, or introduce ourselves. My mother and I knew the routines: deliver the load, ask for another load, and get some sleep. Every truck driver followed those routines, and the only real difference between us and them was that US Xpress labeled our truck Out of Service. Little did we know that this meant below zero temperatures for 106 hours without any heat, water, food, or bathroom facilities.

            My mother finally got someone at US Xpress to allow her to drive the semi to the terminal in Springfield, Ohio. The terminal was only about 255 miles away, but there were conditions that we had to follow to arrive safely. We had to drive at night to avoid any open weight stations that might put us Out of Service, we had to drive no more than 35mph to prevent the cracked frame from breaking up underneath us, and we had to do it on icy terrain. Upon our arrival at the terminal, Us Xpress gave my mother a brand new Peterbilt 387 and a load to California. Nice awards for getting the truck safely to the terminal, or were they bribes to keep us quiet?

            Climbing up the side of Vale Mountain in Colorado, the new Peterbilt 387’s serpentine belt broke. We pull over to the side of I70 and contacted Dispatch who told us to continue to the nearest truck stop. As we descend the mountain my brother-in-law, who is also a truck driver calls me on my cell phone. I update him of the situation as a loud explosion from the engine echoes through the mountains, the dashboard lights go out, and the steering wheel vibrated. I gave my brother-in-law the new information as it happened. He screamed “Don’t hit the breaks, don’t hit the breaks, you’ll need them for the end”. I repeated the message to my mother and she yelled back “I know, I know” as she fought to control the trucks direction. As we neared the bottom of Vale Mountain my mother applied the breaks and steered the semi to the side of the road. I was still on the phone with my brother-in-law when my mother started screaming, “Please stop, please stop”. Gary immediately demanded to know what was happening and he got an ear full when I screeched “We’re going to hit the bridge”.

            The semi stopped less than an inch from the bridge. The tie rods busted through the engine leaving a gaping hole for the oil to leak out. The tow truck that US Xpress didn’t want to send to replace the serpentine belt was now being sent as a wrecker. We stayed in the semi, huddled together for warmth as we endured another night of below zero temperatures. It took the tow truck 18 hours to arrive and we were taken back over the mountain from once we came. US Xpress put us up in a motel for three days where we cranked the heat up to 90, ordered takeout, and slept.

            The call from Dispatch sent us to a location in the area to pick up another driver’s truck and deliver the load that was assigned to it. The reason that we were given was that the other driver has a family emergency and flew home. One of the problems with this assignment was that the driver left her belongings in the truck. This means that our belongings took up the bunks and there was no room for us to sleep. Dispatch was unrelenting in their original decision even though this  truck would not shift properly, did not break properly, and a milk jug of urine was sloshing around inside the closet area. When Dispatch asked my mother what was wrong with the truck, she replied with “everything”.

Our first night was spent in a truck stop with the windows rolled down and the heat turned all the way up. Exhaust fumes billowed inside the compartment from the vents as snowflakes drifted into the window. My mother, slumped  over the steering wheel trying to get a few hours of sleep, while I sat in the passenger’s seat staring at our belongings occupying the bunks, and wishing there was room to crawl in-between them. When the sun rose we continued on our journey never getting any sleep. Ten hours later we pulled into another truck stop, took a shower, ate dinner, and sat in the truck until the sun came back up. After three days of this Dispatch finally relented and told us to drive the semi to the nearest US Xpress terminal.

I never worked for US Xpress; they labeled me as a passenger for three long, terrifying years. My mother was employed by the company, but I was employed by my mother. She did all the driving, and I did all the dirty work. My mother is still bound by the company to keep everything quiet due to the paperwork she signed when she became employed, but I am not! I can honestly testify to us going through 57 trucks within three years that were all as terrifying and deadly as the first. I can testify to inaccurate directions that put us in dangerous situations from the trailer hanging off the side of a mountain to the gravel under our tires sliding down the side of another mountain as we looked for a place to turn around in a National Park. I can testify to all of these things because US Xpress labeled me as a passenger, and therefore they were not responsible for my safety. I can testify to my mother becoming injured on the job and US Xpress wanting to fly her to the closest terminal, but leave me in the truck to rot, and a time the doctor took my mother out of work due to an injury only to have the company force her to work at one of the US Xpress terminals. I did not receive the benefits that their employees received, like health insurance, or a paycheck, and I was not subjected to the company having life insurance in my name. I am sure that US Xpress did this to save money since most passengers only stayed out a few short months. I however was the exception and therefore became the loophole in their paperwork.

The pay was excellent, and the traveling was fun and exciting which is why it took me three years to decide to stop working with my mother. I took an apartment in Alabama that had a driveway big enough for my mother to park the semi, but I didn't see her for over a year. US Xpress refused to let her come home even on the holidays, so we talked on the phone as often as we could. Being on the truck and living in those inhospitable conditions for three years caused health problems that put me in critical condition for a year. My mother used the family emergency card and was dispatched on a load to my town. As my mother was trying to nurse me back to health, US Xpress tried to force her back to work by assigning her a load to California. My mother refused the load, and the company forced her to resign.    

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